You can’t be both a racist and an American.

I know that this is going to piss off a whole lot of people and well, good…. The simple fact is that you can’t be both a racist and an American, you need to pick a side. I’ve briefly mentioned this before and caught a world of shit on both ends, citing our nation’s history and the current political climate. I get that, hell, I grew up in the south and am very aware of our current situation. Charlottesville is only three hours away from my hometown and I’ve got color in my family so yes, this is something I take personally. The simple fact is that this is still the United States and yet some of the most so-called patriotic people fail to get this. 

Didn’t you pay attention during the announcements? Liberty and justice for all? 

It’s part of the Pledge of Allegiance and even though I was kicked out of school in the eighth grade for refusing to stand for it, before it was cool (I’ve never had a stomach for forced patriotism) I still remember how it goes. The key part is, say it with me kids, “Liberty and Justice for ALL.” 

No, not liberty and justice for people that look and pray like you, for all the people living here. When you say the pledge, you’re making a commitment to support all of it, not just some of it, not just the parts you agree with or that fit your agenda, all of it.  

You don’t get to pick and choose. 

This is just like the shit I have to deal with in regards to the vocal minority of people who call themselves Christians, yet who by no fucking means, live a Christ-like life. I call em Hypochristians (Hypocrite+Christian) since they like to pick and choose what parts of the bible applies to them yet completely miss the point of love and compassion. Most of them haven’t actually read the book, they don’t know the factual history of how it was developed (and various chapters that were omitted) and if half of them followed it to the letter, the world would be much more entertaining. 

You don’t get to point your finger and vilify homosexuals while you justify your own adulteress behavior, especially when the very son of the God you worship told you to practice love and compassion to all. The same goes for being an American, you don’t get fight for your right to bear arms but then try to exclude people from having the right to vote. See where I’m going with this?  

It’s not a simple as filling out a few forms.

A good friend of mine married a rock star from Australia and let me assure you that it wasn’t as simple as “I do” boom, now you’re an American. Nope, not at all, it took them over a decade before they could relax. Please note, this is a pretty white boy, English is his first language and he’s literate. Not to mention the fact that the guy also owns his own construction business and employs several “locals”. Despite having every advantage possible, at any given time they could have denied the application and sent his ass back home. 

What I’ve found in various discussions on this topic is that those who are most vocal against immigration know the least about the actual process. Most of the time they don’t even know any immigrants, legal or undocumented. 

In a weird way, I have to blame porn.

Yes, porn, and scared white boys. My personal opinion is that most of these guys that are so over the top racist simply have small dicks. They’ve see the big black cocks in porn and get scared that a black man is going to fuck their girl better than they ever could and most of them buy really big trucks to compensate for this fact. 

You don’t want criminals yet we saved your ass? 

April 1746 was a bad time in Scotland and as a result of various factors, my people got their ass kicked. Long story short, a whole lot of rebel Highlanders were forced from their homes and shipped over here. This country was partly founded by criminals and terrorists in the eyes of the English. And guess who stepped up thirty years and a generation later to help kick the shit out of em? The sons of the same rebels and criminals that were exiled, then we helped invent bourbon and NASCAR so yeah, you’re welcome. 

No, I’m not saying that we should just open our borders and welcome MS13 in with open arms. I’m all about screening people and making sure that we don’t end up with any more nut jobs on the street since our government treats mental health like it’s the punchline to a dad joke. But we’re spending 7.6 BILLION dollars per year on ICE. You’re going to seriously tell me that part of that budget wouldn’t be better spent on streamlining the immigration process for the people who are trying to come over legally? 

If you’re a nazi, you’ve already lost. 

I find it ironic as hell when these vermin cry discrimination. When you’ve made it clear that your entire agenda is to wipe out everyone that doesn’t look, act, pray and fuck just like you, you make it really difficult to have a dialogue. Why am I going to be civil to someone that wants to murder my friends and family? 

Everyone else at the table has agreed that yes, we have our differences but we’re willing to respect one another and do our best to live in peace with each other, working together to build a better nation. You fuckers have made it clear that well, you want to gas the entire room. It….it makes people uncomfortable to say the least, if not outright threatened and hostile towards your very presence. 

Say what you want about the Black Panthers being a militant group but at least they helped open daycare centers and build their community. Maybe I missed out but I’ve never seen nazi scum doing a fundraiser for the local food bank? 

White pride, proud boys, whatever, I really don’t care what you dumb motherfuckers want to rebrand yourself as, if the foundation of your ideology involves you being superior due to your lack of pigment, you can get fucked. 

You want to cry freedom of speech and assembly so that you can deny that right to others? Please, for the love of fuck explain this logic to me.  

And yes, I know that not all of you actually participate in lynchings but when you don’t speak up against it, you’re condoning the behavior. That’s how this shit spreads. It also goes against the constitution. Despite living in a nation where “all men are created equal”, you for some reason want to act like you’re special? Either you support the constitution or you don’t, you don’t get to pick and choose.  

Let me make this simple for you. The flag stands for equality, okay? This means that you don’t get to scream the word nigger while flying the flag or you’re just spitting in the face of what it stands for. You’re also spitting in the face of every veteran who served to protect the freedoms that the flag stands for. 

It’s the American dream whether you like it or not. 

When this country was founded, it’s because we were sick of getting fucked over by the government. The goal was to create a nation where anyone could come over with nothing, work their ass off, contribute to society and have a piece of the pie regardless of what they looked like, what language they speak or what God they pray to, if any at all. 

Let’s face it, we’ve done a shitty job at following through on this. That doesn’t mean we’ve failed altogether. It’s just a matter of doing a better job practicing things like equal rights and despite the fact that it’s taken over two hundred years, we’ve made a little progress. 

At the end of the day, I’m just lazy. 

I don’t have time to be racist, it’s a lot of energy and effort for nothing. I really don’t care if you suck dick in an alley for fun and pray to some eight-armed octopus God. All I ask is that you don’t force your faith or lifestyle on me and that, if we have to work together, you show up on time and have table six ready when I call for it. 

I’m being serious, I would much rather have some weirdo that doesn’t speak my language but works hard and does his job than some pretentious white boy who’s on his phone half the time and acts like I’m demanding an organ when I tell him to take out the trash. Come on people, it’s a simple concept.